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On occasion, Jay Spring believes he is “the most exceptional individual alive”. As a diagnosed narcissist, his grandiose moments frequently escalate into “really delusional”, he explains. “You are on cloud nine and you’re like, ‘The world will recognize that I stand above others … I’ll do great things for the world’.”

For Spring, these episodes of self-aggrandisement are usually coming after a “crash”, during which he feels sensitive and embarrassed about his conduct, rendering him especially susceptible to criticism from others. He came to wonder he might have this personality condition after researching his symptoms on the internet – and subsequently evaluated by a clinician. However, he doubts he would have taken the label without having already reached that realization by himself. Should you attempt to inform somebody that they have the condition, {they’ll probably deny it|denial is a common response|they’re likely to reject it,” he comments – most notably if they experience a sense of being better. “They’re in a delusional world that they made for themselves. And within that framework, I’m the greatest and {nobody can question me|no one should doubt me|my authority is absolute.”

Clarifying Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Though people have been identified with narcissism for over 100 years, definitions vary what people refer to as the term. People frequently term everybody a narcissist,” explains an expert in narcissism, adding the word is “overused” – but when it comes to a professional assessment, he believes many people hide it, as there is significant negative perception around the illness. A narcissist will tend to have “an exaggerated self-image”, “difficulty understanding others’ feelings”, and “a strategy of using people to seek admiration through things like displaying material goods,” the specialist clarifies. Those with NPD may be “deeply egotistical”, to the point that {“they’re not able to hold down stable relationships|“their jobs are damaged|“they have a distorted view of reality,” he adds.

Emotional connections were never important about anyone really, so relationships weren’t a priority relationships seriously

Gender Differences in NPD Presentation

Although up to 75% of people identified as having the condition are males, research points out this figure does not mean there are fewer narcissistic women, but that narcissism in women is more often presented in the covert form, which is less commonly diagnosed. Male narcissism tends to be more socially permissible, as with everything in society,” notes a young adult who discusses her NPD and borderline personality disorder (BPD) on digital platforms. Frequently, the two disorders are comorbid.

Individual Challenges

“I really struggle with receiving negative comments and not being accepted,” she says, “because if I hear that the issue lies with me, I either go into defence mode or I withdraw entirely.” Although experiencing this response – which is sometimes referred to as “narcissistic injury”, she has been attempting to address it and take advice from her support system, as she doesn’t want to slip into the harmful behaviour of her previous life. My past relationships were toxic to my partners as a teenager,” she admits. Through dialectical behavioural therapy, she has been able to manage her condition better, and she explains she and her current boyfriend “operate with an understanding where I told him, ‘If I say something messed up, if I say something manipulative, address it {right then and there|immediately|in the moment’.”

Her childhood mainly in the care of her father and notes she didn’t have supportive figures in her youth. I’ve had to teach myself all this time what is and is not appropriate to say when arguing because I never had that growing up,” she says. Every insult was fair game when my relatives were insulting me during my childhood.”

Underlying Factors of NPD

Personality disorders tend to be connected with early life adversity. Heredity is a factor,” notes a mental health specialist. But, when someone shows signs of narcissism, it is often “tied to that individual’s particular early environment”. Those traits were “their strategy in some ways to manage during childhood”, he continues, when they may have been neglected, or only shown love that was based on meeting specific standards. They then “persist in applying those familiar tactics as adults”.

In common with many of the those diagnosed, one individual thinks his parents “may be narcissists themselves”. The 38-year-old says when he was a child, “the focus was always on them and their work and their social life. So it was like, stay out of our way.” When their they engaged with him, it came in the form of “significant demands to achieve good grades and professional advancement, he recalls, which made him feel that if he didn’t fulfill their expectations, he wasn’t “worthy.

As he grew older, none of his relationships ever worked out. “I’ve never cared about anyone really,” he says. Therefore, I never treated relationships seriously.” He didn’t think experiencing genuine affection, until he met his current partner of three years, who is facing similar challenges, so, like him, has difficulty with emotional regulation. She is “very supportive of the internal struggles in my head”, he notes – it was actually she who initially thought he might have NPD.

Seeking Help

Subsequent to a consultation to his general practitioner, he was directed to a mental health professional for an assessment and was given the NPD label. He has been referred for psychological counseling via government-funded care (ongoing counseling is the only treatment that has been shown to help NPD patients, specialists note), but has been on the treatment delay for a year and a half: The estimate was it is probably going to be in a few months.”

John has only told a few individuals about his condition, because “there’s a big stigma that the disorder equates to toxicity”, but, personally, he has embraced the diagnosis. “It helps me to understand myself better, which is always a good thing,” he explains. Those interviewed have come to terms with NPD and are looking for support for it – hence being willing to talk about it – which is likely not typical of all people with the disorder. But the growth of online advocates and the development of online support communities indicate that {more narcissists|a growing number